Purpose Is Dynamic

Many people spend a large portion of their lives searching for their purpose. They ask themselves questions like: What am I supposed to be doing? Why am I here? What is my calling?

These aren't bad questions. In fact, they may be some of the most important questions a person can ask. The problem is that many people assume purpose is something that must be discovered before they can begin living. They imagine purpose as a destination. A single answer. A fixed point somewhere in the distance waiting to be found.

As a result, they wait. They wait for clarity in some epiphany like “That’s it”, or “Voila!”, as if figuring out the trick to it all. They wait for certainty as if permanence is part of our everyday life. They wait for a sign to show them the way out of many ways. Sometimes they wait for years. Sometimes they wait until time doesn't permit them to wait any longer.

What if purpose doesn't work that way? What if purpose is not a destination, but a process? Just as your very life is an ongoing process, who is to say your purpose isn't changing by the moment like your circadian rhythm changes the bodily procedures throughout the phases of the day?

When I was younger, my goals were different than they are today. Going outside to play, getting the sequel of my favorite video game, passing my college classes by the skin of my teeth, and many more. The things that seemed important then are not necessarily the things that seem important now. This is true for most people. A child wants different things than a teenager. A teenager wants different things than an adult. An adult at twenty-five may have very different priorities than that same person at fifty.

Why?

Because experiences shape us.

The jobs we work, the people we meet, the mistakes we make, the successes we achieve, the places we visit, and the challenges we overcome all influence how we see the world. As our understanding changes, our goals often change as well. Not just with time, but with circumstances, responsibilities and our own will to change.

If our goals can change, why wouldn't our purpose?

We are not meant to discover one sole purpose in this life. It changes like the days pass. There isn’t one perfect path - one correct answer. While that may be true for some outliers, I am not convinced it is true for everyone. Our goals often lead us to other goals, and by achieving one’s believed sole purpose, would that leave nothing left to do? I think not.

A person may spend ten years building a career, only to realize they are being called toward something different or that the initiation just prepared them for the next step in said career. A parent may discover that raising a child becomes their purpose for a season of life. Someone recovering from an injury may find purpose in healing. A teacher may find purpose in helping others learn. An entrepreneur may find purpose in building something that did not exist before.

None of these purposes are necessarily permanent. The career builder goes on to help others build their career. Children grow and go on to raise themselves or even the parents for a time. The healed use their experience to impart healing on others. A teacher who has nurtured growth in others may face a mirror and realize they need nurturing themself. After inventing an amazing item, the entrepreneur sets sights on innovating the life changing device.

Impermanence does not make them less meaningful. If anything, it makes each experience that much more powerful and valuable.

In nature, very little remains the same forever. Seasons change. Trees grow. Rivers carve new paths through the landscape. Life itself is dynamic. Perhaps purpose is dynamic for the same reason.

Maybe purpose is not something we find once.

Maybe purpose evolves as we do.

One of the greatest mistakes people make is believing they must have everything figured out before taking action. They tell themselves that once they discover their purpose, they will begin. Yet action is often the very thing that creates clarity. A person who wants to become stronger goes to the gym and learns through experience. A person who wants to write begins writing. A person who wants to start a business begins building.

The path becomes clearer through movement and not before it. Consistently stepping forward reveals more of what’s to come.

Purpose often reveals itself the same way. As you work your way deeper into finding your purpose, the experiences you have, the motions you make, and the challenges you face push and pull you in different directions, bringing you closer and farther from actualizing; at times, creating a whole new purpose. Experiences show us new sides of ourselves and cause us to realign with different goals. The moves we make take us to new spaces, expanding our vision for possibilities and our challenges make us more resilient to the sudden flows of life.

The irony is that the people most obsessed with finding their purpose are sometimes the least likely to discover it because they spend so much time searching that they forget to participate in life itself. Those trying to find their purpose, have surely lost it to begin with.  A seeker can only find what they are expecting, and so if the purpose isn't explicitly known, they will seek forever, never knowing when the purpose has been found or already experienced.

Life provides information that we use to set goals. Action towards goals provides feedback to make known the unknown. Experiencing unknowns provides understanding. And understanding shapes purpose. 

In middle school, I was not chosen for a tennis team due to athletic ability, which prompted me to start training on my own. I whacked a tennis ball against a wall with my racket- back and forth I went, for hours at a time. Training alone gave me insight into certain perceived strengths and weaknesses which lead me to trying new and abstract things. What if I hit it hard? Could I return it? What if I hit it lightly so that it would just touch the wall? Could I get to it before it bounced a second time? I learned how to react faster, how to control the ball better and how to control my strength consistently. These experiences lead me to understand my own capabilities and raised my confidence.

When it came time to try out for the team, the coach, noticing my improvement, asked me to not only join the team, but also lead the younger groups in athletic training to improve their speed, endurance and mobility. At 13 years old, I had my first coaching job. My purpose, at the start, was to join the tennis team, but life had more in store for me and over 20 years later, my purpose continues to change depending on my circumstances. I am still a coach, but the physical attributes I built for myself resulted from a mindset that I now try to instill in others. The will to keep going forward even when life is changing around us at a moment’s notice.

There wasn’t a wrong choice to make at the denial of my acceptance to the team. I ended up liking track and field more anyways, but during summers I looked for ways to continue coaching. I worked with youth soccer teams to help improve physical performance and coordination and lent advice to friends who wanted to know how to slim down and get more fit. Not pursuing a tennis career didn't mean that I chose the wrong purpose, it just led me to a different one. 

People sometimes fear choosing the wrong purpose. So they spend their time building up for the right purpose, which is usually unknown. It becomes a series of shooting down all the wrong purposes in hope of accomplishing the right one. Wrong or right, perception dictates the way we feel about the feedback from seeking our purpose and we act accordingly. It is in this way that purpose is dynamic. Our situations can lead to destinations we never thought of and how we respond changes what we aim for next. The wrong purpose today is the right purpose tomorrow. 

If we let it, the fear eats away at us, confuses us, and makes us angry and resentful of our choices. It is embracing each moment and every lesson that helps us grow into more capable individuals. We become more responsible and prepared for higher goals, hence higher purposes. Fear of choosing the wrong purpose is like being afraid of what you don’t know is going to happen - a fear of the unknown that spirals you downward into guilt and shame.

Our personal choices along with the pressure of social media, take us into a realm of uncertainty and envy. What purpose is there for me in this sea of people seemingly doing everything there is to do already? Seeing people pursue their goals can also fill us with an elation of also pursuing goals. Easily, we can find ourself in a mind of falsehood, betraying our own routes for success by following others.

Perhaps the goal is not to find a single purpose that lasts forever but to recognize the purpose that is in front of us right now, pursue it fully, learn from it, and remain open to the possibility that life may ask something different of us later.

Purpose is not a destination.

It is evolution over time.